What a Coward...
The risk of love is high. Yet, falling in love is unstoppable. No matter how hard you fight chemistry, when it is engaged - you become completely unable to avoid it or walk away from it. I know that feeling very well as many of you do as well. The mere interaction with that someone creates those butterflies, that silly smile zips across your lips, and you are completely hooked.
What I see over and over again online are the people who lack the confidence to look at another person whom they have those feelings for and risk their heart - simply because they fear the unknown. We all have bad things that have happened to us in the past - and only the true self can determine if something or someone is right for them, but to walk away from something that could be amazing simply because you are scared requires a change in thinking.
Love is a tricky matter for most adults. Not because they can't find it, but because they don't love themselves enough. How can you expect someone to love yourself more then you love yourself? I was in a relationship like that in the past, and it took me months after the end of that partnership to conclude that no matter how hard I loved one of the greatest loves of my life, he would ultimately never love me the same - because he had no foundation of love to grow on. We delude ourselves into thinking that we are "just great" with who we are - but are we? Do we really love ourselves that much? Do we really go out of our way to cherish and value who we are as individuals?
I have many single girlfriends who are very self-aware that their self-love needs to come first before they embark on looking to love someone with the same authentic feelings they have for themselves. I firmly believe you can love someone without loving yourself; however, the quality of the love will waiver if you are not secure in who you are 100%.
As well, "coward" is a strong word, but it takes a lot of strength to do what is best for them and not for someone else at the moment, and the people who are aware or blissfully ignorant that they are not is a vicious cycle that perpetuates pain when the opposite is what they are looking for.
The same line can be drawn in the world of Boudoir Photography. There is literally NO END of women who seek out my services, yet never book. It is rarely a cost issue - only their own lack of confidence that stops them from committing to something that scares them. At my heaviest - almost 250lbs, I had a photographer friend who lives in Montreal do my photos, and I loved them. Yes, I noticed the parts that I needed to work on still, but what she captured was who I was - and I was not ashamed at all with the art I received back. It was beautiful, my husband loved it and not one person I showed it to looked at me and made me feel anything but outstanding.
The thing about confidence ladies and gentlemen is that even if you don't feel it 100%, take the risk. Put on your best face, settle the nerves and show the world that you are good with you. Start the process to make that feeling how you feel all-day - just about every day. Take risks, do the things you don't normally do, see how it comes together for you and learn from it - because being stagnant is no way to exist in this world.
"It's OK to be scared. Being scared means you're about to do something really, really brave."
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GorgeousChaos Beauty & Boudoir Photography Red Deer, Edmonton and Calgary 403-550-9965 firstname.lastname@example.org